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That is an insult and you'll answer for it at recess. Freud said that there is a link between anger and wit. Anger turned inwards is depression. Anger turned sideways is Hawkeye. Charles, you're drinking your hair! Wouldn't you like to know!

This one paid for two Cadillacs. How'd you know my size? I am holding it. Where do you think you're going to get a MacArthur to show him, for Pete's sake? The Marine emblem, Semper Fidelis. Corporal Klinger's a corpsman. He's a good soldier. He'd prefer to be a good civilian, toward that end he dresses, uh--

Could've really showed him. Right. They'll start looking for us in Bethlehem. My mother had those. Had a premonition about Pearl Harbor. I don't care if she did put an ice cube in your underwear! Girls will do that. You mustn't hit her with the dog! Now until I get back, you're the man of the house. Yes, I know Mommy thinks she is, but you really are!

Meat? Where'd you get meat? This is fantastic! Wait...where's the dog? This is fantastic! Now, that must have been some shot. Yes, sir. I'm afraid he's doing some very important sleeping for the army right now. I'm looking for a Colonel Sherman Potter. Then how come he sent her a bill?

And do you, Donna Marie Parker Winchester the Third, take this pickled amnesiac as your un-lawful, un-wedded, un-hubby? Oh, those I can let you have. An "un-person"? Now I'm an un-person. Do you know that right now back in Maine my father, not realizing I'm undead, is at this moment mourning his "un-son." I predict an early end to this war, if it doesn't rain and we get all wet. It ain't easy telling people how close you are to 'em when they aren't here. Pierce, why must you always thwart my attempts to bring a little culture into this neolithic pup tent?